Monday, May 19, 2008

Only the Government knows what's right

Senator Obama has been letting more sneak out about his true agenda. The other day in Oregon, the omniscient Senator said "We can't drive our SUVs and eat as much as we want and keep our homes on 72 degrees at all times".

How dare someone actually set their thermostat at such an unacceptable temperature? Only the enlightened Looters in Washington know the proper settings for your house. In fact, if the Looters had their way, we'd all be driving monochrome, compact hybrid cars; wearing uniform, brown suits; and going to bed at the same time. We'll all have a meal plan to ensure that no one is more nutritionally advantaged than others. Perhaps everyone's income will be legislated to be equal, as well.

Every light fixture in your house would have those magnificent, completely environmentally safe twisty-bulbs. We'll just use our collective will to keep the mercury in them from causing problems. After all, AlGore says those bulbs are the savior of the planet, right? And don't forget, corn should be used to make ethanol, not food.

Besides, America is full of too many evil, rich people. We'll just raise taxes, because who doesn't want to pay their "fair share", anyway? During the race to become POTUS, the definition of "rich" has been ratcheted down from $1,000,000.00 per year to $500k, to $250k. Now apparently $102,000 per family is rich. And since private citizens don't really know which charities to give to, the Looters will redistribute that money for us.

And, now that the Supreme Court has set the precedent with the Kelo v. City of New London decision, your home is not really even yours. If the Looters discover that you set your thermostat too high or low, leave a light on in your house, flush your toilet twice or use more that 3 squares of toilet paper, they might just condemn your house, so they can put in a shopping mall, to be built by the Looter's cousin.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

three squares of toilet paper? who taught you how to wipe, man? if you do the fold-over method, you should get by perfectly fine with one square.

and what's wrong with 72 degrees? i bet j. mcCain has to wrap up in a goose-down blanket in 72 degrees.

Juan Blanco said...

72 is fine by me. Actually I prefer 68-70. I'm just worried the gestapo will knock on my door with my thermostat-violation form!